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Thursday, June 21

it's ok to be...

nervous!

oh my gosh, I totally forgot to share my college experience, LoL! First, Maine College of Art has no student parking so I had to park on the street, which was fine -- I found parking about 2 blocks away. But, the class is 3 hours long -- the meter lasts for 2 hours -- so a couple of us had to run out in the middle of class to feed the meter. Next time I'm going to bite the bullet and park in the garage.

I was way early because I had expected to have a hard time finding parking. So I went into the studio on the third floor and checked my mail and looked at a few books that were on the table. As it got closer to 1 my stomach started getting nervous and I started worrying about lots of things. When the class started I was so nervous I thought I was going to puke, LoL! It's been 26 years since I graduated from college. Phew.

Lots of feelings and negative comments started running through my head. you know the ones I'm talking about.
what if everyone is better at this than me.
what if I'm not cut out to do this.
what if I can't REALLY draw.
what if I make a fool of myself.
what if what if what if what if.

It was horrible. really. all those stupid thoughts.

Then, the class started off with writing some things about ourselves down on index cards -- which we had to share. The last thing we had to share was one thing the others wouldn't know about us.

I said. I am extremely nervous, ha ha. then I wasn't.
the funny thing was once I had said that several other ladies said the same thing.

It felt good to feel the feelings, and then it felt AMAZING to feel them go away. In an instant -- they were gone and I was ready to embrace what this person (and others in the class) want to teach me. 

Anyway, we started with a collaborative drawing. Alex called out drawing prompts and we had to draw on paper tacked up on the wall. a bald man in a boat with a floral dress on. a lemon. an opened tin can. a planet. a vacuum cleaner. a hot dog cart. a shark. For each prompt we moved to a new spot on the wall. 

it was fun. and relaxing. and I giggled at the things I drew at each spot. what a great ice breaker. 
For the last 20 minutes we had to draw a part animal/fantasy creature part real animal or human. This is my prehistoric Robin feeding her baby. Sweet boy thinks it's a chicken eating her baby, ha ha. 

For homework I have to draw -- one black and white line drawing -- everyday. She mentioned that a lot of people use that as a prompt to start drawing series of things. I decided to work on flowers. 
  
this is a small hand book by Global Arts -- 5 x 8 I think. We're not supposed to use pencil -- just pen -- or black -- and white. I'm not ready to give up my pencil just yet. But I love the drawing I did last night. Fox Glove. sweet. I am further convinced, today -- that I am on the right path.
Anyway, I've had a stressful few days working out some issues with a potential co-worker that ended up not working out. It's amazing how people will twist and turn the facts to make themselves look like the good guy and you the bad guy. I didn't realize how much stress I was actually feeling until I started working in my Flower a Day Journal. As I drew I felt the tension leaving my body and I started to relax and breathe. I decided I needed some more me-ART time and -- at 11 last night started to add some color to an art journal page I started a week and a half ago. I really needed the art time.  Needless to say, I'm a little zonked today, lol. but it was totally worth the loss of an hour of sleep.

With that, I need to get in the shower and get my day started. Thank you for stopping by -- have a wonderful Thursday!

Don't forget -- you have a few more weeks for your Whatevers Submissions -- we want to see them.

3 comments:

  1. Great post...love the flowers...and remember it's all good. Anyone who knows you knows how sweet & kind you are ;)

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  2. Lovely post! Thanks for sharing your first day and your feelings. I love the fox glove drawing and the watercolour birds are fabulous. Can't wait to see what you do next.

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  3. YOU are going to be AWESOME! Well, even more awesome than you already are! lol Let the Art free you from the stress!!!

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